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Poems
!Back-0ff!
Posts: 159
in Off Topic
What are the funny poem you have heard?
Comments
Excuses Excuses.
Late again blenkinsopp?
Whats the excuse this time?
Not my fault sir.
Who's fault is it then?
Grandma's sir.
Grandma's?What did she do?
She died sir.
Died?
She seriously dead alright sir.
That makes four grandmothers this term Blenkinsopp
And all on PE days.
I know.It's very upsetting sir.
how many grandmothers have you got Blenkinsopp?
Grandmothers sir?None sir.
You said you had four.
All dead sir.
What about yesterday Blenkisopp?
What about yesterday sir?
You were absent yesterday.
That was the dentist sir.
The dentist died?
No sir,My teeth sir.
You missed the maths test Blenkinsopp!
I've been looking forward to it sir.
Right,line up for PE.
Can't sir.
No such word as "can't" Blenkinsopp
No kit sir.
Where is it?
Home sir.
What is it doing at home?
Not ironed sir.
Couldn't you iron it?
Can't sir.
Why not.
Bad hand sir.
Who usually does it?
Grandma sir.
Why couldn't she do it?
Dead sir.
On the Ning Nang Nong
Where the Cows go B ong!
and the monkeys all say BOO!
There's a Nong Nang Ning
Where the trees go Ping!
And the tea pots jibber jabber joo.
On the Nong Ning Nang
All the mice go Clang
And you just can't catch 'em when they do!
So its Ning Nang Nong
Cows go B ong!
Nong Nang Ning
Trees go ping
Nong Ning Nang
The mice go Clang
What a noisy place to belong
is the Ning Nang Ning Nang Nong!!
Dearest Creature in creation,
Study English pronunciation.
I will teach you in my verse
Sounds like corpse, corps, horse and worse.
I will keep you Suzy, busy,
Make your head with heat grow dizzy.
Tear in eye, your dress will tear.
So shall I! Oh hear my prayer.
Just compare heart, beard, and heard,
Dies and diet, lord and word,
Sword and sward, retain and Britain.
Now I will surely not plague you
with such words as plaque and ague.
But be careful how you speak:
Say break and steak, but bleak and streak
Cloven, oven, how and low,
Script, receipt, show, poem and toe.
Nor am I
I have edited your poem to include phonetic spellings for the confused LOL
You just drink fast very hot tea to burn your tongue a little, this works too
u forgot reckon haha